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      Our Daughter Is Having an Affair With a Married Man. How Do We Stop It?

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      A 20-something woman who lives with her parents has incurred their disappointment by continuing an affair with her former boss. Since she won’t end things, should they tell the man’s wife?Our daughter (early 20s) is having an affair with her former boss at a fast-food restaurant. He is married, and his wife discovered the affair by seeing texts on her husband’s phone. We discovered it by noticing a big increase in data usage on our phone bill. (They text each other incessantly!) We asked our daughter to stop working at the restaurant, and we believed that the affair had ended and that husband and wife were trying to work things out. Recently, though, I became suspicious and saw on our daughter’s phone that the affair was ongoing. We told her we were disappointed in her, but she refuses to end things. She lives at home and drives our car, and we are fuming. We are tempted to tell this man’s wife about the affair, but we don’t want to crash our daughter’s life worse than she’s doing herself. Thoughts?FATHERYour daughter may always be your baby, but she is no longer a child — though she is still quite young. You don’t mention how old her married lover is, but I didn’t detect any concern in your letter that he had manipulated her into a sexual relationship. So, as long as that’s the case, I sympathize with your distress, but I don’t believe you should make any ultimatums or tell the man’s wife about the affair.I suspect, too, that framing your conversation with your daughter around your disappointment in her — a common parental ploy for inducing compliance through guilt — is probably less effective than talking to her directly about the people she is harming with her behavior: notably the husband’s wife, and probably herself. These affairs tend not to end well.But that leads to my central point: Sometimes, we learn only from our mistakes. If your daughter is not yet able to grasp that it is profoundly unwise to attach herself romantically to a person who is betraying a current partner, as her lover is, then she may have to learn that lesson the hard way. Monitoring her phone or taking away the car keys is beside the point. You will simply have to wait.Miguel PorlanEager to Make the Jump From Cards to HugsMy ex-husband’s daughter is 40 and lives 2,000 miles away. Her father and I divorced many years ago. She is a busy mother and wife, but she always sends me cards on special occasions. She writes that she loves and admires me, and I do the same. But when she visits her father nearby, I discover it only after the fact. Recently, she and her family visited for a week, posting about all their fun outings — to which I was not invited. Again. So hurtful! Her behavior tells me I am not a priority. Even so, she is my children’s half sister, and I adore her. Should I express my hurt to her, complain to her father (with whom I am on good terms) or just accept her unkind behavior?We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Trump, Vance y sus aliados insultan a las mujeres al final de la contienda electoral

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      Trump ha utilizado un lenguaje misógino para referirse a Harris, fomentando un ambiente entre sus aliados y en sus mítines que se regodea en los insultos sexistas.De pie en su mitin final de la campaña de 2024, el expresidente Donald Trump, en los primeros minutos después de la medianoche del día de las elecciones, utilizó un rudo comentario sexista para atacar a la representante Nancy Pelosi, la expresidenta de la Cámara de Representantes quien es una de sus rivales políticas de larga data.“Es una mala persona”, dijo Trump en el Van Andel Arena de Grand Rapids, Míchigan. “Malvada. Es una malvada, enferma, loca”. Hizo una mueca exagerada, con la boca abierta para llamar la atención sobre la siguiente sílaba: “Pe…”.Luego levantó un dedo dramáticamente, fingiendo que se había dado cuenta. “Oh, no”, dijo. Mientras miles de personas se echaban a reír, Trump pronunció la palabra por el micrófono. “Empieza por P, pero no la diré”, añadió Trump. “Quiero decirla”.Mientras la multitud rugía aún más fuerte, algunos de los asistentes empezaron a suministrar la palabra que él apenas había omitido, gritando: “¡Perra!”.En los últimos días de la contienda, Trump ha hecho llamamientos directos a las mujeres mientras hace frente a una brecha de género en las encuestas que les ha preocupado a él y a su equipo. Ha evitado mencionar su papel en el nombramiento de los jueces de la Corte Suprema que anularon el derecho constitucional al aborto, una cuestión que, según las encuestas, es una de las principales preocupaciones de las votantes femeninas.Pero, al mismo tiempo, Trump ha utilizado un lenguaje misógino para referirse a la vicepresidenta Kamala Harris y ha fomentado un ambiente en sus mítines en el que oradores y asistentes se sienten cómodos profiriendo el tipo de insultos de género que, en otra época política, habría sido impensable decir en público.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Gov. Greg Gianforte of Montana Handily Wins Re-election

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      Greg Gianforte won re-election as Montana’s governor on Tuesday, according to The Associated Press, helping Republicans solidify their power in a state that in recent years has taken a sharp turn to the right.Mr. Gianforte, a former software executive, defeated a Democratic challenger, Ryan Busse, a former gun industry executive. Montana was once known as a state with many ticket-splitting voters, and before Mr. Gianforte’s initial election in 2020, Democrats held the governor’s office for 16 years in a row. But Republicans now have broad control over state government, having gained strength during the coronavirus pandemic as wealthy newcomers flocked to the state and many residents, new and old, complained about government overreach.Mr. Gianforte and Republicans have approved bills to curtail abortion, although some restrictions have been struck down by the state’s courts. He signed a law banning transgender care for minors while also advocating limits on government regulation.Mr. Busse has talked often about his background in hunting and fishing and expressed concern that Montana was turning into a playground for the wealthy that is becoming increasingly unaffordable and inaccessible for middle-income people.In his ascent to the state’s top leadership, Mr. Gianforte overcame a series of scandals, including a 2017 conviction for assaulting a reporter during a campaign for Congress.In 2021, after he became governor, Mr. Gianforte killed a wolf and was given a warning for having failed to take a wolf-trapping certification course, as required by the state. This year, law enforcement officers who investigated the wolf killing said they had been pressured by superiors to lie about the governor’s role in the killing. More

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      Alsobrooks Defeats Hogan in Maryland, Keeping a Blue-State Senate Seat

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      Angela Alsobrooks, the Democratic Prince George’s County executive, has easily defeated former Gov. Larry Hogan to become Maryland’s first Black senator, according to The Associated Press, holding a crucial seat for her party as it grasps to keep the Senate majority.The victory was an important win for Democrats in the first competitive Senate race in deep-blue Maryland in decades.Ms. Alsobrooks, 53, the top official in a majority-Black Maryland county in the D.C. suburbs, will become only the second woman to represent the state in the Senate.Maryland’s congressional delegation is currently all male. Ms. Alsobrooks will succeed Senator Benjamin L. Cardin, who is retiring after three terms at the age of 81.Along with Representative Lisa Blunt Rochester of Delaware, who has also won her Senate bid, Ms. Alsobrooks will be part of the first pair of Black female senators to serve in the chamber at the same time. They will be the fourth and fifth Black women to serve there in history, after Carol Moseley Braun, Kamala Harris and Laphonza Butler.Ms. Alsobrooks said her top priority in office would be working to pass the Women’s Health Protection Act, and pursuing legislation to try to create economic opportunity for Marylanders.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      NYT Crossword Answers for Nov. 6, 2024

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      Has Adam Aaronson gone a bridge too far?Jump to: Today’s Theme | Tricky CluesWEDNESDAY PUZZLE — Every word in a crossword clue offers crucial context toward a solution — and that’s exactly what may have made the themed clues in today’s crossword, constructed by Adam Aaronson, so frustrating. At 39A, for instance, the clue asks for a seven-letter [African country]. This leaves the solver to scan an entire continent, nine countries of which fit the clue’s parameters. And, at 53A, any birder can tell you that the category of [Bird with a distinctive call] includes most birds — so we can only assume that the clue wants us to choose one of roughly 11,000 species at random.Of course, the broad strokes are intentional. Mr. Aaronson is no cuckoo constructor, this being his 13th puzzle for The New York Times, and his theme reveals a brilliant method to what might otherwise seem like madness. Let’s dive into the details.Today’s ThemeAt 63A, a phrase meaning [General idea] gives us a hint to the relationship between themed clues and their entries at 14-, 29-, 39-, 41- and 53-Across. That phrase is LONG AND SHORT OF IT.14A, for instance, wants a [Silvery element]. There are a few of those on the periodic table, but PLATINUM happens to give us two of them — one long and one short. (The shorter entry is highlighted with gray squares.) Similarly, plenty of groups might satisfy [Band in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame] — but BLACK SABBATH (29A) gives us the LONG AND SHORT OF IT in one.I’ll let you enjoy the rest of these artful executions by Mr. Aaronson on your own. And if you feel so inclined, please do share your favorite [Bird with a distinctive call] in the comments. I’ve developed a keen interest in birds, which is completely original and unlike the experience of anyone else my age.We are having trouble retrieving the article content.Please enable JavaScript in your browser settings.Thank you for your patience while we verify access. If you are in Reader mode please exit and log into your Times account, or subscribe for all of The Times.Thank you for your patience while we verify access.Already a subscriber? Log in.Want all of The Times? Subscribe. More

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      Florida’s Abortion Rights Ballot Measure Fails, Keeping Six-Week Ban in Place

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      A ballot measure that would have enshrined abortion rights in the Florida Constitution failed, according to The Associated Press, delivering a major defeat to proponents who had hoped to restore broad access to the procedure in the nation’s third-largest state.The measure, known as Amendment 4, won 57 percent of the vote, falling short of the 60 percent required for passage. It would have allowed abortions “before viability,” usually around 24 weeks of pregnancy. Florida bans most abortions after six weeks, before many women know they are pregnant.The defeat, while not unexpected, halted what had been an unbroken winning streak for abortion rights groups on ballot measures since the Supreme Court overturned Roe v. Wade in 2022. Voters sided with abortion rights in all seven states that had ballot questions on the issue before this year, in states as different as Kansas and California. But the highest vote that any of those earlier measures won in red states was 59 percent, just under what Florida, with its higher threshold, needed to pass.The Florida measure’s failure is a political victory for Gov. Ron DeSantis, a Republican, who had become the face of a well-funded and well-organized opposition campaign. He spent much of his political capital, and considerable state resources, to defeat it. Another ballot measure that Mr. DeSantis and his allies strongly opposed, which would have legalized marijuana in the state, was also defeated.Mr. DeSantis and Republican lawmakers enacted a 15-week abortion ban in 2022 and the six-week ban in 2023. Florida had previously allowed abortions up to 24 weeks and had been a destination for women in other Southern states with stricter laws.Organizers of the Yes on 4 campaign raised more than $100 million to get the measure on the ballot and campaign for it, knowing it would be a difficult battle. Though similar measures have passed in other conservative states, Florida’s 60 percent threshold is higher. Going into Election Day, polls showed support hovering around 60 percent.The nonpartisan Yes on 4 campaign knew that it would need support from Democrats, Republicans and voters with no party affiliation. Organizers hoped that enough Republican-leaning voters would vote yes even if they also supported anti-abortion candidates.Former President Donald J. Trump, a Florida resident, had opposed Amendment 4, after initially suggesting that he might support it.Eric Adelson More

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      New Yorkers Pass an Equal Rights Amendment Tied to Abortion Access

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      A ballot measure in New York designed to safeguard protections for abortion and for those most vulnerable to discrimination was passed on Tuesday, according to The Associated Press.The measure, known as Proposition 1 and the Equal Rights Amendment, was intended to codify abortion rights in the State Constitution by including “pregnancy, pregnancy outcomes and reproductive health care and autonomy” as a protected class.The amendment bars discrimination based on an expanded set of conditions, adding ethnicity, age, disability, sexual orientation, gender identity and pregnancy. The State Constitution had only prohibited unequal treatment based on race, color, creed and religion.The measure was fiercely opposed by Republicans and anti-abortion activists including a Schlitz beer scion, who spent $6.5 million to defeat it. It was also opposed by the New York State Sheriffs’ Association, which warned that its protections against gender discrimination could create challenges for law enforcement.Democrats had hoped that the ballot initiative would help boost turnout by energizing voters who care about abortion rights. Public sentiment in New York appeared to be on the ballot’s side: A recent Siena College poll shows that some 69 percent of New Yorkers approve of the amendment.Republicans blanketed the airwaves with messaging against the proposal.Some of the most heated attacks centered on the protections the amendment would offer to transgender people — particularly transgender girls, who many Republicans believe should not be allowed to play on sports teams with cisgender girls.Much like abortion, protections for transgender people already exist in New York State law. The purpose of the amendment is to make it harder for any future legislature to make laws that would erode those protections.But opponents said the initiative would go further, claiming that it would allow children to obtain gender-affirming care without parental involvement and extend voting rights to undocumented immigrants. Neither is true, according to the New York City Bar Association. More

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      El equipo de Trump veta a algunos medios de su fiesta electoral

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      Varios reporteros fueron vetados tras realizar una cobertura crítica de la campaña.La campaña del expresidente Donald Trump ha impedido el acceso de varios periodistas a su evento de resultados del martes por la noche en su club Mar-a-Lago de Florida.Tara Palmeri, corresponsal política sénior de Puck, dijo que tenía previsto asistir para transmitir desde el evento como parte del especial de la noche electoral de Amazon con Brian Williams. Pero, dijo en su pódcast el martes, la campaña de Trump la vetó después de que ella escribiera un artículo sobre la ansiedad interna en torno los números de votación temprana en Pensilvania.“Resulta que he molestado al jefe de campaña de Trump con mis reportajes y han decidido denegar mis credenciales”, dijo Palmeri en el pódcast, Somebody’s Gotta Win, y añadió: “He sido honesta y justa todo este tiempo cubriendo estas elecciones.“Chris LaCivita, uno de los directores de campaña de Trump, calificó a Palmeri de “columnista de chismes” en una publicación en las redes sociales el 31 de octubre, el día en que se publicó el artículo sobre la ansiedad de la campaña, y confirmó que se le habían negado las credenciales.Un portavoz de la campaña de Trump no respondió inicialmente a una solicitud de comentarios.El equipo de Trump celebrará un evento VIP en Mar-a-Lago el martes por la noche. También se espera que Trump se dirija a la multitud en un acto más amplio en el Centro de Convenciones de Palm Beach. A otros periodistas se les permitió asistir a los actos de campaña.La campaña de Trump revocó la entrada a un equipo de periodistas de Politico después de que su revista publicara el lunes un artículo en el que se decía que un director de campo de Trump era un nacionalista blanco que compartía sus opiniones en internet bajo un nombre diferente. Un portavoz de Politico declinó hacer comentarios. Sophia Cai, reportera nacional de Axios, también fue excluida del evento, según una persona con conocimiento de la medida.Aja Whitaker-Moore, editora en jefe de Axios, dijo en un comunicado que Cai era “una excelente reportera” que había hecho “cobertura esencial, clínica para Axios.“Trump ha criticado regularmente la cobertura de los medios de comunicación, y sus amenazas contra los periodistas se han intensificado durante esta campaña. More